Friday, November 14, 2008

Love Dare Day 31

I'm just gonna be honest with you here.  I am going to reveal something to you about my husband.  He already knows it, has admitted to it, and is perfectly fine with it.  He... is a mama's boy.  Yes, that's right.  A mama's boy.  And quite frankly, it used to bother me a lot.  There have been many times that I felt like he was choosing her over me or something that she wanted him to do over something I  didn't want him to do.  Fortunately, neither of our parents are meddlers.  They will often offer advice or give their opinions, but they are not pushy or all up in our business, unless we want them to be.

Over time, I have grown to see that being a mama's boy isn't really as bad as I thought it would be.  There are some real benefits.  Like... she will fix him his favorite dinner instead of me having to do it.  She will offer to help with the kids.  She will hem his pants or basically lovingly do most anything he asks.  And, now that I have boys of my own, I hope that they will see the way that Frank loves his mom... and show me the same kind of love and respect that he gives her.  I won't mind a bit if they are mama's boys. :)

The Word does give us some very clear direction on this though.  Most of us heard it in our own weddings or at the very least in someone else's.  Genesis 2:24 says  A man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.  Some of us don't take this to heart and it can cause a real problem in many marriages.

"Leaving" just simply indicates breaking a natural tie.  It's not talking about walking away from your parents.  Just they their roles change.  Now they are there to give advice, but they can not tell you what to do anymore.  This can be hard for some on both sides!

"Cleaving" has the notion of catching someone by pursuit and holding on tight for safety.

We don't know more than God.  Really.  I'm not just saying that.  This was His design for our marriages.  And even though it may be difficult, we have to put this verse into practice.  If we keep oneness on the forefront of our minds over time our marriages will begin to reflect it.  

Dare: IF THERE IS A "LEAVING" ISSUE CONFESS IT TO YOUR SPOUSE TODAY AND RESOLVE TO MAKE IT RIGHT.  MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE A PRIORITY OVER EVERY OTHER HUMAN RELATIONSHIP.

As I said earlier, this is not something we struggle with concerning our parents.  We are so fortunate in this area.  But we are still supposed to put our marriage relationship over "every other human relationship".  Ladies, this includes our kids.  *ouch*  As moms I know this can be very hard.  I promise you that I live it too.  However, your marriage depends on it.  I did not practice this when I had my first.  But over time, I came to see how damaging this was to my marriage.  And, when I got surrounded by some good, Bible-believing friends, they were quick to point that out.  If your marriage is not strong, your family won't be either!

6 comments:

Elaine at Matters of the Heart) said...

I loved when our Pastor talked about this at Church. It was heard so clearly in our house. You are doing an amazing job with your dares. I am almost inspired to start mine... :)

~*Mistee*~ said...

You have an award over on my blog!! Have a great weekend!! :0)

Mrs. Chief said...

I learned your last paragraph the hard way...none the less the lesson was learned!

Shell in your Pocket said...

What a great reminder!
-sandy toes

p.s. congrats on your "hot" award!

Rissa said...

Hey any news on when fireproof will be out on DVD?
just wondering!!

Martha said...

That's funny that your husband has known about the dare! Mine would do the same thing and just "enjoy the ride"... :)

Once again, great post! It's hard for me not to want to put my kids first.