Saturday, October 18, 2008

Love Dare Day 11

Whew! Can you say wiped out?? I am soo tired after last night. I think the last people went home about 11:15pm which is not too terribly late, but I am still so tired! On to the dare though!

Here is the challenge for today: WHAT NEED DOES YOUR SPOUSE HAVE THAT YOU COULD MEET TODAY? CHOOSE A GESTURE THAT SAYS "I CHERISH YOU" AND DO IT WITH A SMILE.

Typically, when we are having a big function out here, the garage gets a thorough cleaning out because we do most of our parties outside. However, the garage did NOT get cleaned out before yesterdays bash. Hubby decided that he would do it today so that he did not have to worry about it for next weekends party. (yes, we are having another one) When he got home from work around lunch time, he got started. He worked all afternoon. I would have helped but alas, I used the kids naptime to go to the grocery store... alone. Needless to say, when he got finished around 6:15 or so he was exhausted. Didn't even want anything to eat.

So, my gesture for him was that I went and gave the kids a bath when they finished supper. No big deal, right? Man, yall sure are getting some insight into the way our family works! It IS a big deal, trust me! Frank is the bath-giver for all the children in the house. I'm not really sure anymore how he got that job, but I can assure you he did not pick it. I don't know why neither one of us want to do it. Well, I kinda do.

Jackson is old enough to get a shower by himself so he is not really the issue. It's the 2 little ones. They get a bath together to speed the process along. And there is always drama involved. Someone isn't sharing some toy (which is a whole other issue) or trying to dump water on the other, or trying to drink all the water. Someone is splashing too much and getting the bather all wet or it's all over the floor. Somehow, Frank ended up with the job. He doesn't like it. But, he faithfully does it everyday.

So, instead of telling Frank that the kids were done with supper and ready for a bath, I just did it for him. It WAS a labor of love. And I made the coffee again. Double whamy! He noticed and was very appreciative.

Consider these stories: I have a car. The car is a bit run down and has not been working right for a while. I take it to the mechanic. The mechanic tells me a list of things that is wrong with the car and that the repairs are going to be very expensive. I decide instead of spending all that money on a car that hasn't been working in a long time that I will put it into a new car that will be dependable. Makes sense, right?

Story #2: While I am working on a tractor, my hand gets smashed by a piece of equipment. I go to the doctor. They take some xrays and tell me that the bones in my hand are crushed and the surgery will be costly. However, I know that it is necessary to fix my hand so I spend all of my savings to have the surgery. Then spend the next several months in rehab. Also makes sense, right? (these stories were paraphrased from the book)

The problem today is that many of us treat our marriages like story #1. When things are going bad and the "repairs" are going to be very, very costly, we sell out. Instead, we should be looking at our marriages like the 2nd story. Sadly, we don't always view our marriages as "part" of us.

We can not let our culture determine the value of our marriage. To compare it to something that can be replaced or tossed aside is to dishonor God's purpose for marriage. That would be like cutting off that broken hand. Instead, our marriages should be a picture of 2 imperfect people choosing to love each other, NO MATTER WHAT!

When you are looking at your spouse, you are looking at a part of yourself. And we all like to treat ourselves well, right? Let's make sure we are cherishing our spouses for who they are, not who we wish they were.

4 comments:

Tammy said...

LOL on the bath stories. I don't kow why -but I, too, don't really like doing it. Hank usually does it - that was a great "treat" for your husband - good tip :)

TLC said...

I loved the comparison - that marriage is more like a "part" of you not something to be "cut off" from your body so casually as people do in todays world. Thanks for the reminder.

Ohilda said...

Ashley,

Thanks again for stopping by my blog. I love your Love Dares but I started midway. I'm gonna go back and print them out so I can start from the first one!

We loved the movie.

Blessings,

Ohilda

Kim said...

Here's what did it for me today....

"When you are looking at your spouse, you are looking at a part of yourself."

Thank you :)