You remember that I said before that Frank and I are very different? And I talked about the water issues? Well, there's more. He likes golf. I don't. I love all things horsey. He does not! He doesn't see the point in riding a horse when he has a perfectly good vehicle. I would prefer that to be my primary source of transportation... if I just didn't have those kids!!
I love concerts, big concerts. And I love being right smack dab in the middle of ALL the people. Frank loathes being in big crowds like that. I also love going to football games. And I don't want box seats either. I want to be in with the crowd where I don't have to be civilized! Frank would prefer the box seats. There are many things that we differ on. But there are also a lot of things that we have in common.
We both like to shop. Although Frank usually likes to shop with a purpose, but we both enjoy it. We both like the theater. Both being in it and just watching. We both like to sing. Frank does it MUCH better though. Music is a big deal to both of us.
Remember that line in Jerry McGuire where Tom Cruise said "You complete me!" Well, while there is so much wrong with that line, there is also some truth to it. We were meant as husband and wife to complete each other in a way. Consider this verse from Ecclesiastes 4:9,10 "Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up". We are supposed to HELP one another. Not to just co-exist, but to multiply the effectiveness of one another.
Hmm... I am supposed to help Frank to be a more effective person. Do I do that? I would have to say a lot of times I don't. My complaining or nagging or just bad attitude in general probably does not help him be very effective in a good way.
When we learn to accept the differences in one another, we can scoot right on by criticism and go directly to helping and appreciating each other. But some of us can't get past the differences. We loose a lot of opportunities this way. How effective our marriages are is based largely on how we work together. How we complete each other.
Do we include each other in big decisions or do we make them on our own and inform our spouse? Do we ask for their opinion and give it full weight? Even if we disagree, we should respect each other enough to ask for their perspective and point of view.
Dare: RECOGNIZE THAT YOUR SPOUSE IS INTEGRAL TO YOUR FUTURE SUCCESS. LET THEM KNOW TODAY THAT YOU DESIRE TO INCLUDE THEM IN YOUR UPCOMING DECISIONS, AND THAT YOU NEED THEIR PERSPECTIVE AND COUNSEL.
I know that Frank is vital to my future success. I can't do it without him. I must include him in all decisions because I want him to be a part of what I am involved in. I want him to care enough about me and what I feel led to be a part of to be a helper and an encourager.
I guess what I'm saying, Frank, is "You complete me..." (hehehe)